


Five Nights at Dream Team Pizzeria

by iamstupid



Category: Video Blogging RPF
Genre: 2nd person usage, Alternate Universe - Video Game World, Blood and Injury, Blood and Violence, Character Death, Inspired by Five Nights at Freddy's, POV Alternating, Video Game Mechanics, animatronic dream george bad and sapnap, fucking morning shifts man, kinda crack but also I took writing this seriously, no beta we die like men, they kill you every time, think Homestuck
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-05
Updated: 2020-08-05
Packaged: 2021-03-06 07:07:59
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,307
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25719325
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/iamstupid/pseuds/iamstupid
Summary: Shitty fucking pizzeria, this is. Tommy has no idea why he couldn’t work at Target or something.
Comments: 27
Kudos: 142





	Five Nights at Dream Team Pizzeria

**Author's Note:**

> TOTALLY forgot to do this box, sorry for anyone that noticed :( This is just a one-shot with the ultimate cringe/edgy writing style of Homestuck ABOUT an FNAF au and that is the worst sentence I’ve ever written someone please remove my internet access
> 
> Anyways, Tommy-centric FNAF au where he (or the we, in this case) get absolutely dunked on

Continue | Main Menu | Settings | Credits

—> Main Menu

MAIN MENU  
* NEW GAME..?  
* SAVES  
* SETTINGS  
* CREDITS

—> NEW GAME

YOUR name is TOMMY. You are tasked with helping set up a girl’s birthday party at DREAM TEAM PIZZERIA in PARTY ROOM 1, reserved typically for smaller get togethers and special shows. It turns out this kid’s parents had paid for a PRIVATE SINGALONG, which means the whole DREAM TEAM are being pulled out for use. You are also tasked with helping TRANSPORT the ANIMATRONICS to the room. 

Your faithful coworker and friend, TUBBO, is currently at home, sick with the flu, which means you are doing this all alone before the store opens. This means waking up and driving to work at 7 AM. You are NOT PLEASED. 

The animatronics also freak you out; sure they’re just animatronics, but they’re CREEPY AS HELL. It always feels like their EYES ARE FOLLOWING your EVERY MOVEMENT, and their security system is VERY FAULTY, meaning they could confuse STAFF with CROOKS. Given the already shoddy reputation of their restaurant, it is NOT IDEAL.

—> open Task Manager

TO-DO LIST  
1\. Punch in and stop by the break room  
2\. Find the party supplies in the STORAGE ROOM  
3\. Find SAPNAP and transport it to PARTY ROOM 1  
4\. Find BADBOYHALO and transport it to PARTY ROOM 1  
5\. Find GEORGE and transport it to PARTY ROOM 1  
6\. Find DREAM and transport it to PARTY ROOM 1 

—> item obtained: KEYCARD  
—> item obtained: KEYS to DREAM TEAM PIZZERIA  
—> stats increased! Click the compass to level up! 

You sigh LOUDLY at the AMOUNT OF WORK. It never seems like you catch a break at this job, and the animatronics are WELL OVER 1000 POUNDS, meaning you will have to USE SPECIAL EQUIPMENT. 

With the KEYS to DREAM TEAM PIZZERIA you unlock the front door, stepping into the rapidly decaying building. It REEKS of MILDEW and AMMONIA in nearly every place, and the wallpaper peels off the wooden backing rather UNPLEASANTLY. It is also the ONLY place that would hire you, which means he has to deal with it.

YOU drop your workbag and keys unceremoniously onto a CARD TABLE in the BREAK ROOM, before punching in with your KEYCARD. The light turns green when it’s finished. You are NOW SUCCESSFULLY PUNCHED IN.

Task Completed! Click the TO-DO LIST to find out more!

You move on to finding the PARTY SUPPLIES in the KITCHEN STORAGE ROOM. This is usually where POTS, PANS, and OTHER COOKING UTENSILS end up, so it’s odd to see PARTY SUPPLIES in the wrong place. You pick them up nonetheless and store them in your BACKPACK, saving it for later.

—> item obtained: PARTY SUPPLIES  
—> stats increased! Click the compass to level up!

NEW OBJECTIVE: Decorate Party Room 1

The walk to PARTY ROOM 1 is that of tired silence. Usually music would be playing over the intercoms, but since you are the FIRST and ONLY one here that makes it difficult. The lights above flicker with each step you take down the hallway. This really is a shithole.

You spend an hour decorating PARTY ROOM 1 for the little girls birthday. It comes out rather nicely, if you do say so yourself.

You wipe your SWEATY HANDS off on your work-assigned trousers, taking a look around the room. The ANIMATRONICS are spread out across the establishment since they were under maintenance yesterday, which means a wild goose chase for each one. 

Before that, however, it is WISE to stop at the staff room for a FLASHLIGHT, EMERGENCY KEYS, and the ANIMATRONIC DEACTIVATION KEY. He’s required to have it on him at all times when near an ANIMATRONIC, which is honestly pretty worrying.

You decide to look for the animatronic SAPNAP first, since it is the most likely to be in it’s normal place, MOO MOO MEADOWS. The name always sounded odd because Sapnap is a PANDA, not a COW, but he always figured it’s better not to question the hand that feeds you. Besides, it’s adorable. 

After a quick wander around the establishment you find SAPNAP behind the curtain in MOO MOO MEADOWS, powered down and unglowing. You make quick work of turning it on and directing it to PARTY ROOM ONE. It seems comically uninterested for an animatronic, but he manages to get it to the party room and power it back down.

Task completed! Check the TO-DO LIST to find out more!

One down, three to go. You wipe the SWEAT off your BROW and take a quick stretch before going off to look for BADBOYHALO. It’s the BACKUP SINGER to DREAM, although it’s been known to hand out CHOCOLATE MUFFINS to kids, so that’s cool. Tommy has no idea where it gets them from.

You decide to check the BACK ROOM of the STAGE for it, because that’s most likely where it would be. The door creeks eerily as you enter and the lights flicker ominously. For good measure you turn on your FLASHLIGHT, pointing it around the room in search of BAD.

Luckily, the animatronic is propped up against a wall next to GEORGE, another animatronic. It seems like they were doing maintenance back here instead of in the MAINTENANCE ROOM. That’s totally against company policy, but the maint guys are lazy either way.

—> new objective: SURVIVE for 35 SECONDS

“What the fuck?” Tommy wonders aloud. The ANIMATRONICS begin to power on. He very quickly decides this is not worth the minimum wage they are paying, insurance be damned, digging into his pockets to look for the ANIMATRONIC DEACTIVATION KEY.

“Hi, welcome to Dream Team Pizzeria, where we have boat-loads of fun!” George and Bad announce at the same time, waving with a free hand. The next line is different depending on the animatronic, but George says, “Do you need me to play a song?” and Bad says “Here, take a muffin!”

The muffin, as it turns out, is a rock hard piece of metal thrown directly at Tommy’s stomach that he narrowly avoids. It clatters to the ground and scares him so badly he drops the deactivation key. He glances up in fear, slowly backing away from the animatronics as they inch closer.

“What seems to be the problem today?” George leers, glowing eyes peering down at him as if he’s an uninvited ant at a picnic.

Tommy scrambles in his head for a response and only sees it fitting to smack George across the metallic face with his flashlight. “This, you motherfucker!” he shouts. George smiles at him eerily when he’s done.

“Do you need me to play a song?” repeats the animatronic, lifting his guitar. Tommy doesn’t realize the British robot’s intentions until it’s too late and it comes crashing down on his shoulder.

He cries out, scrambling as quickly as he can on the ground to the curtain. Pain flares everywhere in his upper body as the flashlight clatters to the floor. “Fuck. Fucking shit.”

“Language!” Bad exclaims in a garbled voice, clamping a frankly terrifying metal hand over Tommy’s other shoulder. He wags his finger disapprovingly, “That’s more than one naughty word, mister!”

—> new objective: transport BADBOYHALO to PARTY ROOM 1

“Alright, now listen here you stupid job.” Tommy seethes angrily, clasping his shoulder, “I’m not getting paid enough to do this. Ever.”

“Do you need-“ George starts. His voice warbles as he shuts down, eyes dimming. Bad doesn’t even say anything as he powers off, finger still poised to wag disapprovingly at him.

“Not getting paid enough to do this.” Tommy sighs frustratingly, “Not even a fraction of it is worth it.”

You hesitantly power BADBOYHALO on to move him to PARTY ROOM 1. It is the single WORST ten minutes you’ve had on this job. It seems like the animatronic is watching your every move, waiting for a moment of weakness. You also don’t swear in fear it’ll turn and attack you.

—> open Task Manager

TO-DO LIST  
1\. Transport GEORGE to PARTY ROOM 1  
2\. Find DREAM and transport him to PARTY ROOM 1

Nothing about your injuries, go fucking figure. You’re watching around with a BROKEN COLLARBONE and no one seems to give two shits. It hurts, too. 

It is currently 9:30 AM, which means you have 30 MINUTES until DREAM TEAM PIZZERIA is supposed to be open. That means fifteen minutes to put the animatronics in PARTY ROOM 1, with a broken collarbone. Fucking to-do list.

You move GEORGE to the party room, but can’t shake the feeling that it’s watching you every time you take your eyes off him. He surprisingly puts up less of a fuss than BADBOYHALO, but it’s still creepy nonetheless. 

Unfortunately the last animatronic is DREAM, the ringleader of DREAM TEAM PIZZERIA. He’s this humongous gray dog with a white, circular mask over his face and a microphone that you’ve always found out of place in his outfit. Unfortunately he was also the last to come out of MAINTENANCE yesterday: the maint guys always leave the last animatronic open because they’re too lazy to shut the back panel completely, which means it is now relegated to YOU.

 _Yeah, tough shit if they think I’d do that,_ you scoff mentally. Then you decide to go look for DREAM because it’s your job, starting in the back with the MAINTENANCE ROOM.

The door swings open almost invitingly, if not for the HORRENDOUS FUCKING SMELL that always seeps out. It’s like someone’s cat died in here every few days, and the smell just gets to CATCH ON and LINGER. You gag every time you have to come inside. It’s that bad.

Thankfully, DREAM is strapped to what looks like an operating table, chest panel popped open so it’s internal wiring is exposed. It’s slick with STICKY LOOKING, BURNT OIL, yet the rest of the ANIMATRONIC is clean. DREAM’s face panels are half-off, revealing rows and rows of metal.

“Not getting paid enough, not getting paid enough.” the Brit murmurs repeatedly, unbuckling the animatronic.

Dream is beginning to power to life, mechanical whirring filling the room along with Tommy’s curses. He doesn’t want to do this again. He just wants to fucking go home.

—> new objective: SURVIVE for 60 SECONDS

“Oh God dammit!” curses Tommy. He lets go of the buckles, stepping back far enough so he won’t be in Dream’s immediate vicinity. Weapon. There has to be some sort of weapon in here.

The animatronic’s coming to life is eerily quiet, but immediately noticeable. When it blinks it’s eyes pupils glow white, and it immediately locks on to Tommy. A staticky audio track begins to play, yet it’s jaw does not move, “Welcome to Dream Team Pizzeria, where anything is possible!”

Tommy scrambles backwards towards the door, bolting for his damn life, weapon be damned. Without the ability to club Dream and break multiple circuits he’s tasked with just surviving for 60 seconds, but that in and of itself is terrifying. He barely manages to get out and slam the door locked before Dream catches up to him, slamming right into it after he locks it.

He is unashamed to say he absolutely screamed during that ordeal, immediately backing away from the door because there’s a huge, deadly animatronic on the other side. But THEN Dream starts barreling into the door, and because those robots weigh thousands of pounds it starts snapping the hinges, so Tommy RUNS. 

The soles of his shoes clack noisy on the ground as he sprints, destroying any hope of being able to hide, and running is immediately off the table. Dream Team’s robots are faster than people. So with running, hiding and confrontation out of the question, what the hell is he meant to do?

“Oh Tommy...” Dream shouts, garbled and staticky, as if someone turned on the radio in a place where it the sound doesn’t reach. 

Tommy nearly slams into a wall when he realizes that he’s in the hallway close to the nightguard’s office. Then he shrieks because he’s wasting precious time recovering while Dream is going to crash into him, he has to be close, the restaurant isn’t big enough for him to not catch up. Tommy leaps out of the way without even looking where the animatronic is. He hears a loud thud.

—> current objective: SURVIVE for 30 MORE SECONDS!

“Thirty?!” shouts the blonde breathlessly, pushing himself to his feet. His shoulder hurts so badly to the point where he’s unable to move his arm, and there’s new aches everywhere after running into a wall like that.

Dream whirrs. His wires are hanging out on the floor, sparking with electricity. Tommy is going to die here. “Thirrrr... ty.” it repeats, glancing at the blonde’s shoes. Then it cocks it’s head to the side. “Sec.. ondddss?”

He doesn’t know how the fuck it can speak. Robots have built in lines, not voices like that, not the ability to read their surroundings as such. His mouth goes dry as he continues to back up. “Y-yeah, thir-thirty seconds, yeah...” the blonde stammers, heart racing.

Dream’s jaw unhinges as it grabs Tommy, cold, metallic hands gripping his flesh so tightly it burns. He curses loudly as the muscles around his broken collarbone twist and flex, sending pain shooting down his body. The animatronic doesn’t even seem to notice.

Tommy’s eyes widen in horror as the jaw widens over his head, those sharp teeth clacking noisily as the inner mechanisms of Dream’s face unlock. He slaps his hands against the animatronics chest, kicks at the metal legs, starts shouting as loud as he can for someone else, because he’s going to die here. 

“Bye bye now~! Come again next time!” Dream says, the pre-recorded voice sounding far too chipper as Tommy’s head is bitten clean off.

—> You have DIED!  
—> GAME OVER! 

Continue..? | Main Menu | Settings | Credits


End file.
